What an exhausting and long year since last August – my last full vacation!
And exhausting … for ALL OF US! I am so fortunate to have been able to work with such amazing and incredible colleagues at The Computer Help Desk over the past … 500+ DAYS! Yes, it has been that long since we started working remotely, late in March of 2020!
Without ALL of their support, humour, leadership, imagination, guidance and every single possible ‘intangible‘ that each and every single one of them, ALL BRING to our Teams meetings, emails, texts, GIFs, Emojis, Jeopardy, Quote Contests, it would have been impossible to accomplish a fraction of what WE ALL DID AS A TEAM!
THANK YOU ALL!
A few key UVic and BC websites for returning to campus in September for everyone!
And you knew it was coming eventually! My propensity(proPUNsity!)for puns and wordplay! SPOILER ALERT – you might groan at some of them!
Full Disclosure: I am always trying to think of puns, much to the consternation of my family, friends and colleagues!
DOUBLE Full Disclosure: So many puns to cook up, so little thyme for them all! Deal with it!
By definition a pun is:
PUN (Dictionary.com) Noun: the humorous use of a word or phrase so as to emphasize or suggest its different meanings or applications, or the use of words that are alike or nearly alike in sound but different in meaning; a play on words. the word or phrase used in this way. Verb: (used without object), punned, pun·ning. to make puns.
Pun (Merriam-Webster) Noun: Definition of pun (Entry 1 of 2) : the usually humorous use of a word in such a way as to suggest two or more of its meanings or the meaning of another word similar in sound Verb: punned; punning Definition of pun (Entry 2 of 2) intransitive verb: to make puns
And as William Shakespeare said, ‘Aye, there’s the rub“, which comes from perhaps his most famous soliliqoy in Hamlet, you know … the one about a pair of bees!
And the ‘rub’ part Ole Bill is referencing is in the Merriam-Webster definition which includes the two words “usually humorous“! And thus the punishment begins!
Why Do Puns Make People Groan? “Puns are threatening because puns reveal the arbitrariness of meaning, and the layers of nuance that can be packed onto a single word,”
Word Nerd: Ode to the pun — ‘the lowest form of humour …’ Puns have been much maligned by a host of commentators. Freud described puns as “cheap,” and Oliver Wendell Holmes assailed them as “verbicide.” …. Punning has been a language fixture through the ages.
And that is very true! The greatest Punster of ALL TIME is … William Shakespeare!
And there are even some particularly punny NUMBERS as well! The punnist number of all time is ‘288‘. Why should this number NEVER be mentioned in conversation? Because it is two gross.
But even puns can be ruined by the nature of their origin or their historical context. And that includes Ole Bill too with a very saucy pun … at the time!
Romeo and Juliet, Prologue: “From forth the fatal loins of these two foes, A pair of star-crossed lovers take their life.”
The word ‘loins’ would originally have been pronounced the same as ‘lines’. This pun refers to the fatal blood lines of Romeo and Juliet – the families that they descended from are the reason for their death, as well as their ‘loins’ (their physical relationship).
Kinda ‘runes’ the moment when any joke is dissected …. or explained! Sheesh! Get with the program, Bill!
In my o-pun-ion, puns are the highest level of .. funny! I admit, they don’t always work, but when they dew, the subsequent tsunami of rolling eyes, repressed rage and ‘Get thee to a winery!” looks are worth it!
A specialized sub-set of puns are Dad Jokes! Yup, I qualify there too! Nothing better than getting an eye roll from my daughter! It is in every Dad Job Description and we have to meet all our Dad obligations!
Star Trek, Star Wars and just about any pop culture media is rife with puns, memes and running jokes! Although how a Horta runs is Star Trek:Beyond me!
And who can argue with Obi-Pun-Kenobi!
And I even own a book on puns, entitled ‘Upon the Pun” …. a crisp analysis of verbal and visual ambiguities … extremely entertaining anthology of frightful jokes ….”
1, 2, 3, ….. or My Favourite Language Lesson of All Time!
Count for me. Yes, count for me. Simple question. Or … is it? Okay, I will ask you to count for me again. Did you repeat your answer or did you ….. count differently?
Full Disclosure: I have used this lesson in classes that I have taught from Elementary to Junior High/Middle School to Senior High – and even on university students!
DOUBLE Full Disclosure: I never tire of this lesson! And maybe, just maybe, you can win a bar bet with it! I haven’t myself, but you might!
TRIPLE Full Disclosure: Is anyone counting my … Full Disclosures?
What was your response? Nearly 100% of the time, the response will be “1, 2, 3, 4, 5 …..” and then a bit of a hesitation! I neither prompt, direct, encourage or judge the response!
At the point of hesitation, I repeat the request, ‘Count for me”. Now, about 50% of the time, I get the same response, but the fascinating part of this is that now, I can get a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT RESPONSE!
“10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 ….” and then it usually ends with ‘ZERO’ or ‘BLASTOFF!
“2, 4, 6, 8, 10, …..” or “5, 10, 15, 20, 25, …”
Or it could be counting that totally surprise me! And that happened this morning, as you will see below, but first, a bit of techy, geeky, codey stuff!
You now need to see the ‘new language’ (code) that I was introducing to my computer science class at the time.
I used this BASIC lesson to describe perhaps the simplest and yet MOST COMPLEX cognitive task possible! COUNTING! Yes, I am oversimplifying this! But my ultimate purpose of this lesson was to teach problem solving, coding and a new language!
Consider the following BASIC programming code, from my old RAM chips:
FOR I=1 to 10 PRINT I I=I+1 NEXT I
So not only is it basic, it is BASIC which is short for:
Beginners All-purpose Symbolic Instruction Code
Okay, so maybe my dredged up BASIC programming skills are not perfect! But that is what I ‘remember’ showing students how to program a computer to …”COUNT”! YOU just did the exact same thing when I asked YOU to … COUNT!
There were FOUR CRITICAL PREMISES you INSTANTLY, and it is an INSTANTresponse, that your required to complete my request, and I did not tell you ANY of them!
Where to START counting
How much to INCREMENT your counting by
Where to END counting
Method of output
So, the basic 1,2,3, 4, 5 ….. Start at 1
Say outloud Increment by +1
Stop … where ?
So simple, yet so complex!
So I enacted a small social/digital/Teams experiment this morning. I asked 3 of my colleagues, via Teams, to ….’Count for me’. That is all. I prepped them by asking them to respond quickly, automatically and instantly. And the results were:
1 (delay) 2 (delay) 3 (delay) 24 (delay) 249
1, 2, 3, 4, 5…
in Japanese
ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC RESPONSES! Thanks to ALL of you for your responses! Totally surprised me too with the never before seen responses! And we used TEAMS TOO! AWESOME!
I then asked them to count for me … AGAIN! And got this:
lightning storm gif (brainstorming!)
C, XC, LXXX, LXX, LX, L
hehe …. good topic …..
THEY CHANGED THEIR UNDERLYING PREMISES!
I only have quasi-super powers, but I successfully managed to change the premises of counting for 3 of my colleagues in less than 5 minutes! LOL! Fortunately I have chosen to use my super powers for good, not evil!
The hardest premise to learn, is always the method of output!
I usually turn the tables on students by asking THEM to ask ME … to count! And I change one thing .. DRAMATICALLY!
I usually go to the chalkboard (yeah, old school, literally!) and ‘OUTPUT’ my response with chalk … and in some sequence they were not expecting, such as starting at ZERO and going NEGATIVE “ZERO, -10, -20, -30, …..” Output could be verbal, printed, sign language, tapping toes, sound … ANYTHING that could convey the output!
Who counts in negative numbers? COMPUTERS CAN! Or even counting the slices of pizza that are rapidly disappearing in the CHD kitchen after extra pizza boxes brought down by Marcus after a big meeting! LOL!
FOR PIZZASLICESLEFT = 34 CONSUME 1 PIZZASLICESLEFT QUICKLY PIZZASLICESLEFT = PIZZASLICESLEFT – 1 NEXT PIZZASLICESLEFT UNTIL NEXT MEETING
Apologies to BASIC ! I am so embarassed, I might just have to … TURTLE this one out!!
So, hopefully I have made you think a little differently the next time someone asks you to count how many people are in the lineup at Mystic to get a slice of pizza or how many computers just arrived in shipping!
Hairless Egyptian Cats or Les chats égyptiens glabres or or GOOGLE TRANSLATE . . . What Could Go Wrong?!
Yeah, no. Not really. Almost. Maybe. Maybe not … what? Really? Ah, the joys of using Google Translate!
Full Disclosure: I use the analog version of Google Translate during the summer for French Immersion (La Maison Française)! Basically, Corn Flakes French! Each side of a Corn Flakes box has English/French and … just get rid of the smallest words … and you have a PERFECT TRANSLATION! And a breakfast too!
DOUBLE Full Disclosure: I TOTALLY use Google Translate for reading blogs, and any other websites or languages, into English. Not perfect, often hilarous, but definitely readable! A good tool!
Just a brief search this morning on Google Translate bring up all kinds of different opinions – good, bad, indifferent. Not too much of a surprise there. GT is a useful tool in my opinion. Not to be completely or totally relied upon, but useful nonetheless.
Many years ago, I remember teaching a Beginner’s Computer Science course at night. And one topic was always how computers do the wrong thing. Apart from the discussion that computers only do what the programmer coded, the one actual event (apparently) was when a computer transation program was used at an Engineering Symposium and all of a sudden, the transcript included the term ‘Water Sheep‘. And it wasn’t wrong! It was a literal translation of … HYDRAULIC RAMS! It was right in a computer codey kind of way! Helpful? Not so much! LOL!
So, the title of this post will … kinda make sense, with the following Google Translation screen grabs! I made up a silly sentence:
“The hairless Egyptian Cats are on the roof downloading FireFox for their Macbook laptops.“
Yeah, a bit silly, but useful! And the actual TITLE as used by WordPress, did not display the Japanese characters! Nor did it show them IN the body of this post! So how did I get them to appear? I used the Snipping tool to turn the text into an image! A trick is all!
And using Snipping, I was able to grab each Google Translate screen, going from English to French AND THEN BACK! Also English to Japanese AND THEN BACK!
So, not too bad! In fact, I double-checked with a colleague and the Japanese translation BACK to English was quite close to the original context.
AND, GT will translate ENTIRE WEBPAGES! Just copy and past the URL of the source language into the translation box, select English (or any language!) and GT will produce a clickable, bookmarkable URL for you to add to your Favourites! Very easy and useful!
Many blogs now add a Translation Widget, so link to the original blog, and then just choose the language Widget and it just works! Very cool!
And I just added it TO THIS BOG BLOG! I hadn’t even checked to see if it was here! AND IT IS! Learn something new each day! YAY! This feature will now be at the very top right hand corner on all posts. And my coffee buddy, Nik, can now read my blog in GREEK!
And there is also mobile device technology too! You can use your camera to translate languages on signs or menus!
Google Translate’s instant camera feature will now make translating a foreign street sign as easy as aiming your phone — even if your native language isn’t English ….. All told, there are 60 new languages in its list of supported languages for instant camera, including Arabic, Hindi, Malay, Thai and Vietnamese. This adds up to a grand total of 88 languages users can translate from by pointing their camera’s lens at the text.
That is actually amazing! Part Scanner. Part Google Translate. Part Dictionary. Part Internet. Part …. United Nations, all in the palm of your hand!
And I leave you with the usual links about the topic of the day! Use Google Translate, it is much better than when I first started using it!
DEFINITELY NOT my most productive morning since working from home!
Full Disclosure: Having a relatively frustrating morning, with, you guessed it … my computer! So, probably a short post today.
DOUBLE Full Disclosure: Taking a Tea Time Out, breathing and … over it now!
FIRST AND FOREMOST – amazing colleagues! I can’t say enough about everyone I work with at the Computer Help Desk! Thanks everyone! And they are doing the same for Students, Staff and Faculty with knowledge, humour and steadfast patience!
My laptop went wonky this morning! Still a bit wonky, but still doing what it does best – allow me to work from home during these interesting times! Everyone was quick to help, offer suggestions and give advice and I am back doing my morning OAC post!
The only downside, would seem to be my bookmarks/Favourites in Edge have gone rogue! And if THAT is the worst thing that has happened on ‘Yet Another Manic Monday‘, then I am good to go with that! I spent the better part of the morning finding and re-setting my bookmarks and access to them. NAILED IT! Well, maybe … THUMBTACKED IT!
I had to take my own advice and just … let it go! I can easily, slowly, rebuild my Favorites and just keep on working at home! A few things that I always try to remember and put into perspective:
PERSPECTIVE! Yup, just how important is it.
Tea! Better than coffee for stress reduction
Meditation – just letting things go. Thanks to Henri at UVic’s Multifaith!
Breathing… kind of a sub-category, at least for me!
Not too much more. Those work for me and me alone. Yes, a big bag of oversimplification, but, it works for me.
So, a perspective story! My lawnmower started on the second try this weekend! YAY! But the rip cord to start it .. RIPPED OUT! So, standing there, lawnmower RUNNING and no way to start it again… Command Line Decision – just start cutting and don’t stop! Just like in Finding Nemo – “Just keep swimming!”, except … mowing the lawn!
I even emptied the catch bag – WHILE IT WAS RUNNING – and kept on mowing! Whew, finished frontyard, lane, alleyway and backyard in about 50 minutes while on FULL THROTTLE!
Makes a good story and then the best part – there are kits to replace the staring cable for under $10!
In hindsight,it was not as stressful as at the moment! But … I decided to …. just keep mowing, just keep mowing and it relieved my stress! Thanks Dori!
Did you know that coffee dates back to 800 A.D.? And that in Arabic, it literally translates into ‘wine’! Cool! There are multiple links below, as always, and you can try a few out and find out even MORE interesting facts about the World’s Most Popular Beverage, by far – if you don’t count … TEA!
And what about coffee here in Victoria! You basically practice some Italian every time you go into a Starbucks – Grande, Venti, And Trenta. But what about some great coffee locations here in Victoria!
Full Disclosure – I like ALL the coffee shops in town! They are all amazing! But the best part of coffee is always … the conversation and companionship with coffee buddies! Check out CoffeeCrew.com for a list of all the great LOCAL coffee shops here in town, updated to April of this year! Nope, I don’t get anything from this at all. It is just a great site for finding local coffee! And you probably already know who runs the site!
Full Disclosure: Contrary to many rumours, I do not speak Klingon. I just like to have the Netflix Closed Caption on for any Science Fiction movie that has … space languages!
DOUBLE Full Disclosure: Early disclosure but my favourite made up language is from the movie ‘Arrival‘. Not only is it a fabulous movie, but they managed to add something new to a language that is CRITICAL to the storyline! WARNING!:- spoilers below about what that is!
The most popular and well known ‘Alien’ language is without a doubt, Klingon! Star Trek has become part of our Pop Culture ever since Spock first said ‘Illogical’. For many years, I would imbed an ‘Easter Egg’ in my CALL Facility demos that had Klingon as one of the many courses taught at UVic. And then … IT REALLY HAPPENED!
And of course, one of the biggest blockbusters of all time, Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings and prequel The Hobbit, contain MANY made up languages by J.R.R. Tolkien! And another UVic course was offered as well, but treating Middle Earth more as a history course than a Linguistics course!
SPOILER ALERT!: And my favourite of them all, that would be top of my own list to learn would be ….. HEPTAPOD B! This is a language that is quite literally … FLUID or maybe SMOKE or maybe SENTIENT INK! And it allows for Time Travel! There simply is no other cooler language than Heptapod B! I will be the first to register when it is offered at UVic!
And if Heptapod B ever IS offered at UVic, since it is a Time Travel kind of language, you would never have to do any homework because … you would have already learned it! That is my kind of course!
Imagine ordering Take Out in …. Heptapod B! They would already know when and what you wanted and it would arrive … INSTANTLY! So many benefits!
And I leave you with the best Elvish script from The Lord of the Ring:
Of Unconscious and Precocious Surveillance of Foudroyant Chrysanthemums or . . . Hard to Spell English Words!
Yet another sentence that you won’t find at Google. BUT, each word IS spelled correctly! And the reason being … SPELLCHECKERS!
Full Disclosure: Eye I am knot bad at spelling, but I am not grate at grammar! Bear with mee!
DOUBLE Full Disclosure: My Grade 1 teacher traumitized me when under constant threat of being whacked with her ruler, could not properly spell ‘cat’ in her presence! All that could come out of me when challenged by her was ….. ‘KAT’!
WAY back when, I took a computer science course at the University of Calgary. One ‘advanced’ assignment was to read in a random paragraph, generated by the Prof, then scan the paragraph and change some words to … OTHER words! They weren’t misspelled, but it was the pre-cursor to spellcheckers, grammar checkers and word processing! Oh, did I mention … we had to program in FORTRAN and … ON PUNCHED CARDS!!!! Good times, good times … KNOT!
Everyone probably has a few words that they consistently misspell, including the word, misspell!
It just doesn’t ‘look right’ with a double-s in the middle! Other words that always seem to throw me are: pronounce, pronunciation, comfortable, principle & principal, compatible & compatible, weird, catchup & ketchup, and of course … CAT! Some are context based confusion for me, some are just … they don’t look right!
So why do some people misspell words? Turns out, it can be a major cognitive challenge!
It turns out thatmisspelling in the brain(if it’s not being influenced by some kind of learning disorder, like dyslexia, which is another matter entirely) is a multi-layered problem involving diverse areas of brain tissue and multiple processes. Spelling, neurologically, isn’t as simple as rummaging in a brain-bin, finding a word, and reproducing it perfectly on paper. There are many stages where things can go slightly awry, and new science means we can pinpoint exactly where in the brain various processes are going wrong. Not much of a comfort when you’ve misspelt the main word in the title of your Powerpoint presentation, but there it is.
And one of my favourite words and that I often spell wrong is QUIXOTIC! It has a neat pronunciation and an imaginative, literary and historic background! Beauty and Chaos all in one word, including how to pronounce it!
What a wonderful word quixotic is! While it is most often used to mean equally impractical and idealistic, it also has the sense of romantic nobility. Its source is from the great Spanish novel “Don Quixote,” whose title character is given to unrealistic schemes and great chivalry. In the middle of a recession and high unemployment, it would be quixotic to imagine that you could quit your job and find another easily.
Spellcheckers are amazing … and annoying at the same time! If I recall, our lab computers have spellchecking turned on automatically for documents in Word/Office. And that causes a clear 50/50 split amongst students using Office! Literally half the students want it turned OFF when it is ON. And you can guess the other half! You can’t hope to win …. best you can hope for is a tie!
Personally, I just crank out the text, I try and catch my spelling mistakes, but I know that upon another read through, I will let Bill Gates decide what word I want to use. OOPS, forgot about that US vs Canadian spelling! And that might also be a future post too – different spellings for common words in US, Canada, UK, Australia, etc. and more curiouser and curiouser … WHY?
And nice to know that Word has spellcheckers in foreign languages too! That is always a ‘weight off my shoulders’ for First Year German students! LOL!
Of Specific Rural Isthmuses
Surrounded by Anemones Overrun by Squirrels or . . . Hard to Pronounce English Words!
I guarantee you that sentence will never be found using Google! And the reason being … it is made up of some of the words that are considered THE hardest to pronounce in the English language!
Full Disclosure: That is the weirdest sentence I could think of. Don’t make me write another one! I am saving other weird sentences for a future post about using …. Google Translate!
So why are some English words so hard to say, even if you are a native speaker? There are those that simply say, “My mouth just doesn’t work that way!” and that actually might be true for some speakers!
Other words throw a curve by including a sound, that does NOT have the corresponding, and logical, letter within the word! For example, Colonel!
But it turns out, there is a rationale for it:
The key is phonology – the science of sounds within the language. Hebrew has five or six vowel sounds and more than 20 consonant sounds. In contrast, English has five written vowels, but 20 vocalic sounds. A written ‘a’ will have numerous different sounds depending on what letters are couched around it.
And to throw yet another curve at you, try this extract from a famous pronunciation poem circa the turn of the century!
Dearest creature in creation Studying English pronunciation, I will teach you in my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse and worse I will keep you, Susy, busy, Make your head with heat grow dizzy. Tear in eye your dress you’ll tear, So shall I! Oh, hear my prayer, Pray, console your loving poet, Make my coat look new, dear, sew it! Just compare heart, beard and heard, Dies and diet, lord and word, Sword and sward, retain and Britain. (Mind the latter, how it’s written). Made has not the sound of bade, Say said, pay-paid, laid, but plaid. Now I surely will not plague you With such words as vague and ague, But be careful how you speak, Say break, steak, but bleak and streak. Previous, precious, fuchsia, via, Pipe, snipe, recipe and choir, Cloven, oven, how and low, Script, receipt, shoe, poem, toe. Hear me say, devoid of trickery: Daughter, laughter and Terpsichore, Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles. Exiles, similes, reviles. Wholly, holly, signal, signing.
Culturally Specific Words and Phrases . . . or . . .
How’s it goin’, eh!
Large Double-Double please and half a dozen Tim Bits to go, eh! And Canada is (probably) the only nation that you will hear and know what that means!
Full Disclosure: I have never ordered a double-double at Timmie’s! I like a bit of milk in my coffee and no sugar … but I will never turn down a Tim Bit!
DOUBLE DOUBLE Full Disclosure: I don’t know a single person that pronounces ‘about‘ as ‘aboot ‘!
Every country has very specific culturally important words and phrases that not only define but describe instantly where you are from … mostly! I find this endearing and patriotic as well!
I love to talk about Canada with the many International students that visit and attend UVic!
Fun Fact: It is often a homework assignment for ESL students to seek out a Canadian and ask them questions about CANADA! This is especially fun during ‘Roll Up the Rim’ time!
And think of how many will now return to their home country and continue to use … ‘eh!’ in their native language! Canada’s “Not So Secret Plan To Take Over The World”!
Worldwide, Canadians can usually be identified instantly by … wearing a Canadian Maple Leaf or Flag on their luggage or back packs! When I travelled through Europe in (ssshhhhh!!!) ’79, my entire BACKPACK was one huge Canadian Flag! It served me very well!
And of course, the obiquitous phrase, ‘How’s it going, eh!!“ is only pronounced PROPERLY by Canadians! I have American cousins and they try, very hard, VERY VERYhard to say that simple phrase, but …. they can never do it! There is a tell-tale ….. pause ….. just before the ‘eh!’ and they just don’t have the timing down, eh!
I bet you don’t know how OLD usage of this phrase is! I certainly didn’t until I watched the next video!
There is even a full Wikipedia page about Canadian English, eh! That means we have arrived BIG TIME!!!!
I am a proud Canadian and will always smile, chuckle and OWN our incredible Canadian distinctiveness of history, culture, origins and especially languages! Now, if you excuse me, I am going to go to the nearest Drive-Thru Tim Horton’s!
And some of the best of MANY Canadian Language, Phrases, Pronunciations and Canadiana that are out there .. and there are ALOT out there! After all, it IS … The Internet, eh!
So that should cover most of Canadian words, phrases and pronunciations from ‘Eh to … ZED – but not ZEE!