J. Kelly Hoey spoke at a UVic Alumni event in the Fall of 2021. You can watch the recording of her talk at the bottom of this page. I just finished reading her book Build Your Dream Network and I took notes that I wanted to organize and share.
People, persistence, planning, politeness, and people
Your network won’t build itself overnight. Don’t get discouraged. Keep at it! A swipe might get you a date, but building real relationships is a long term investment in other people.
What it’s not
“Those moments when you exchange business cards with someone and figure out how you can benefit from them.” ~Jonathan Beninson
What it is
Networking is all about strategic curiosity. You can’t type in your question and expect an immediate answer with people you meet. When you use your network like a search engine:
- You might not get the answer you’re interested in
- You might not get any answer at all
Think about what you’re interested in doing and what the person you’re interested in meeting with is interested in. When a connection benefits both, it is more valuable for both.
“You can’t just sit back and think magic will happen – you gotta enthusiastically wave your wand, put some tricks up your sleeve.” ~ Alison Levine
Consistent actions produce results more often than serendipitous encounters with a dream boss in the grocery store line up. Think sit-ups: consistency is where the effort you put in gets you on the path to success.
What’s your goal?
How do you figure it out? Do some research – talk to someone who loves what they do!
You have an idea, but … What’s causing that hesitation or uncertainty? Do you need to conduct more research? Maybe you need to talk to a mentor or get more feedback to focus on your goal.
So you have a goal! So move on to deciding who can help you reach it!
Who can help you achieve your goal?
Time to do some research – ask a mentor and seek information from friends. If they are already in your network, stop procrastinating and ask for help! If they aren’t in your network, take a second look. Don’t overlook anyone – everyone matters.
- Strong connections – friends, family
- Shared experiences – coworkers, club members, classmates, peers
- Learning – mentor, boss, teacher
Relationships
“Relationships are your secret weapon. It pays off (big time) to be nice.” ~Erin Newkirk
It’s all about gratitude. End a conversation by saying thank you. Introduce yourself by saying, “Hello, my name is Heather and I’m grateful to be here. Thank you for having me.” Sign an email using “With Gratitude”.
Purpose and preparation
Know why you wrote an email or sent a message or accepted the invitation to an event.
- Is the opportunity aligned with my goal(s)?
- Will my participation add value to the other attendees and be valuable to me?
- Does the opportunity expand my connections or build on existing relationships?
- What does my gut say?
Events you should never turn down
Never say no to opportunities to get to know your peers and colleagues. The importance of social skills at work is directly related to the way technology has shifted the way the work is organized towards flexible teams, job rotation, and multitasking.
Things you can do to improve your visibility online
- Maintain a complete LinkedIn profile
- Once a week, post an update on: industry-relevant news, about an event you are attending, or a question for your network
- Connect with everyone you meet on LInkedIn
Ways to build connections IRL and online:
- Follow the person on Twitter or Tik Tok
- See who you might have as a common connection on LinkedIn and ask for and introduction
- Send a LinkedIn connection request to people you meet at events. Include where/when you met, who you have incommon, why you may want to stay connected
- Follow the person’s publications or posts on their blog or places like Medium.
- Leverage your UVic alumni network. Over 184,000 people follow UVic on LinkedIn – an amazing resource for job leads and introductions
- Set up a Google alert for when companies or individuals are mentioned in the news
- Attend events when you discover the person you want to meet is scheduled to speak
- Live tweet interesting panel discussions at an event and make sure to include the Twitter handle of the panelists
- During Q&A Sessions, tell people your role, company, department, then ask your question in a clear and precise manner.
- Follow up connections that you make online with real-life meeting – can be as quick as a chat over coffee at a conference.
- When you feel like your email is being ignored, send it again, politely. And follow up again after that too.
Keep your connections in the loop so they can share in the joy of your success along the way.